Just to piss you off.

As you can imagine I spend a lot of time writing my internet comments in a very calculated and specific way. There is meaning and motive to every word and every phrase.

Normally that motive is to specifically and exclusively bother you. It’s a very big part of my life.

I love that part of the internet.

Kinda like “guy code”

“Was said he was with you last night”

"Yep, all night. Cleaned the spark plugs in my car and drained the blinker fluid. Couldn’t have done it without him "

But instead it’s “parent code”

“Yeah fortnight is closed. They close it so everyone can get a good night’s sleep and be ready for the morning!”

I was going to tell a personal story about telling my son McDonald’s was closed when I was broke or in a hurry but it reminded me of another cute store.

My son broke his arm in a McDonald’s once. Hyper extended his elbow. Got a couple pins.

Anyway a year or so later they completely remodeled that McDonald’s.

We drove by the demolished building during the remodel and my son shouted “that’s what you get for breaking my arm! Who’s broken now!”

Adorable vengeance served adorably cold.

I appreciate your kind words.

And you pretty much nailed it on both fronts.

I listened to some shrink talking on the radio probably over a decade ago. She mentioned that it wasn’t abnormal for her patients to say they don’t know what they enjoy.

I matured late and had kids young. My kids are adults now.

I don’t have hobbies or interests. I’ve been busy working .

My boss pissed me off the other day. I could find an easier job. Maybe take a pay cut.

What else would I do though?

I don’t have hobbies, I don’t really want one. I don’t have friends, and I never really wanted them. I do have family and people who love me don’t worry.

I don’t have friends, hangout spots, hobbies, TV shows I binged. I don’t even know what I like. So I guess I work? I should probably find something. Not mineral collecting but maybe trains?

I mean yeah but that’s a different kind of unfairness.

What I’m talking about is one person being hungry while another person is forced to eat food when they aren’t. You’re more talking about someone who doesn’t deserve a multiple course meal.

Knowing I’m going to mostly throw this shit away and not enjoy it while there are other people who want it sucks.

This kind of thing always seems so unfair to me. They were writing a book and meeting new friends. Meanwhile I’m so damn tired and ready to rest. I’d give you’re friend 10 or twenty years off my own life if it were an option.

I wouldn’t hurt myself, I’m just saying another 30 or forty years seems so daunting…there’s people who want those years and that’s unfair.

It was closed lol rescheduled for the 31st. I think I’m going to go dressed up as a judge.

It’s Florida. Titusville.

And the courthouse was closed when I went there today because of the hurricane. Guess they don’t have power yet.

The clerks office is closed too, and the website hasn’t been updated and still says my court date is today.

I even tried calling the non-emergancy police number and they don’t know. They told me to call the clerk on Monday. Which will be fine unless my court date is rescheduled for Monday at 9am when they open.

There’s no way I can deal with the fime immediately. That’s kind of information is exactly what I was asking about…

I live paycheck to paycheck. I don’t get paid again until next week.

They really expect people to pay the unknown fine immediately?

I’m housing insecure. I’ve always worked hard but it’s never been “my place” it’s always a roommate or girlfriend and I move around A LOT. Plus one of the symptoms of my ADHD is “time blindness” it’s hard for me to judge how much time has passed between two events. That’s why I didn’t think about my license might be expired. 1 year, 7 years, 12 years… It all feels the same to me.

That’s something to consider. I just don’t want to seem like I’m being difficult to the judge.

Yeah,.even ignoring the joke comments that are funny, alot of people are saying I should fight. I doubt that would be a good idea. It was an honest mistake and I’ve got a clean record. I think being honest is my best bet.

I haven’t renewed my license yet. In my state I have to take the written test again so two appointments at the DMV

Im also in retail management so between COVID call outs, holiday roll outs, and a hurricane… I haven’t had a day off in months.

With this new solid advice, I had an idea and wanted to check with you.

When they call my name should I ignore it, as to not seem too desperate.

When they call my name again should I say “daaaaamn I heard you the first time! My license is expired not my hearing. Chill you’re shit nigga” (to clarify I’m unambiguously white)

Glad I asked I had no idea. Do I need to make the hand motions when I get to “skeet skeet godamn”

I thought of that. I saw the viral video with that dude driving during his video court.

I was going to walk. It’s a small town and I walk a lot as a hobby anyway.

Since I realized my license was expired I’ve been walking to work and to the store. Again it’s a very small town and I can walk just about everywhere.

However if they are going to ask I might want some proof…no can’t afford an Uber right now but maybe I could take some pictures of my walk? Or take the bus just to have a bus ticket?

How does that work In this situation tho? My license is expired and I was driving. How could I say not guilty? Wouldn’t that just piss the judge off?

Actually I’m not young. Im 35 but I drive like an old man so never even get tickets much less had to go to court for anything.

I’m assuming my chance of going to jail over this is low but I’m still worried about it. Ive never been to jail and that would cause me to miss work and I need my job.

I don’t know if criminal court would be a better option because I can’t think of something lesser than letting my license expire accidentally.

Do I need a public defender? I didn’t intentionally do anything wrong I just didn’t know my license was expired? I’ve got a clean record it was just a mistake.

Yeah, that’s one thing I’m worried about. Powers out because of the hurricane. I’ve got black jeans and a polo shirt clean.

Don’t forget they did that several times!